Sugar
SUNY Jefferson
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Sugar

Zoe Turtura

Daddy can you pass me a strawberry
The one coated in sugar laid inside the fridge with locks
Next to the coco-colas I am not allowed to drink
It is 8 pm and I have missed curfew but I just wanted to see you 
Labels of different kids displayed on your walls 
I take pictures of myself 
Why is this picture of me when I was twelve 
I write these poems that explain your mental health but you do not like me reading them out loud 
She gained control, daddy you are the king of this household 
Remember us? Remember me? 
Your little... boy yes you need to make it to his every baseball thing but you have missed my
performance 
Yes, I will pay for you to get here 
I just want you to get here. 
She wants to come to take pictures of my amazing day just to explain to everyone else that we are one big happy family 
My neck aches from the discomfort of the switch you play at night when she is tucked away 
That is my favorite time of day 
She wrapped our hearts in boxes and gave them away to someone else 
A hug from a man’s arms was something I craved but today I am scared of it 
Daddy, will you hold my hand? You are too far away that is okay, I understand maybe when I turn sixteen 
next month I can drive to achieve your touch 
Maybe next month you could take me out and- 
Oh, she already has it covered. 
A hug with no meaning is a true thing because I have been hugging her for eleven years straight 
If I play softball will you meet me at the field? 
My hair is now dark like the wintertime sky, we can have hot cocoa for those specific nights 
I have learned not to ask too much and I do not have many words to say 
But what I needed you to understand dad, is that all I wanted was a strawberry.